How You Do It

There was a guy I used to know, a fellow nursing student, who wore a T-shirt that said:

Nookie; Just Did It.

I think he graduated.

I’ve been working with an established Australian publisher to formulate a deal for writing some books. Severed Press expressed interest in hearing proposals, so I wrote a bunch of ideas based on current, unpublished original WIP’s I have.

They rejected all of them except one that they wanted to change quite a bit. Further discussion gave more clarity around what for them would be a sweet spot in my creative contributions to their publishing empire.

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Where The Wild Thinks Are

A couple of years ago I spent the day at a High School, talking to English classes of students aged 15-17 about writing. It was a fun day, the kids were smart, engaged and I like to perform.

During a library Q&A session a girl asked, “Where do you get your ideas from?”Poop

It’s the most common question authors get along with, “Why?”

My stock answer is, “I order my ideas online. They come from a factory in China, in a cardboard box labelled Tractor Parts.

I then went on to talk about how it works. For creative types (which is anyone who actually stops long enough to poke at a random thought) ideas come from everywhere.

The best ideas come from asking What If?

The rest is just typing until your fingers bleed.

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Writing for a LAF

“However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.” ~ Winston Churchill

I learned some new management-speak today. In a culture that thrives on keywords, catch-phrases and some really incomprehensible assaults on the English language, this one stood out in a good way.

Lead. Align. Follow.

I immediately thought of how this applies to writers. We are a constantly moving organism with a million individual writers and artists, each of us working in isolation for the most part. We read widely, we write furiously.

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The Tattooed Baby Kickstarter Castle Whale

If you call yourself Save the Whales, every once in a while you have to save a whale.

~ Tom Ahern

 Once upon a time… if you wanted to go into business you worked a day job, saved up some money. Wrote a business plan and went to the bank and seriously considered giving oral pleasure to the loan officer behind the desk in order to get the funds you needed to maybe get your business off the ground.

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Dying of Exposure

“Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.”

~ Groucho Marx

The Universe isn’t sentient.

Readers are sentient (mostly)

Neither the Universe or the reading public owe me a favour or charity.

It is popular to say, There is a remarkable sense of entitlement among writers. We all expect (nay, demand!) overnight success and that every man and his dog (good dog) read our every word and buy our books and leave reviews and so on and so forth.

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A Book Is A Condom.

“I’m sure the only act that sells more books than a good banning is a good burning.”
~ Pansy Schneider-Horst

EBook reading devices are like telephones in call centres. Sometimes you want to throw a book across the room and sometimes you want to slam the phone down in an arseholes ear. With eBook readers, like call centre telephones, you just can’t get that satisfaction.

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Rodeo Brain

I’ve blogged before about my diagnosis of ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder).

It’s a contentious condition. Some believe it’s nothing more than an excuse for drug companies to medicate children.

I used to think that it wasn’t a real condition aOzymandiasnd the symptoms came on when kids were on lifestyles high in sugar and low in physical activity.

Some research and the risk of losing my job sent me to a specialist who agreed with my doctor’s diagnosis and I’ve been on Ritalin since November 2014.

The difference is remarkable. I can focus now. I can do things. I am no longer like Ozymandias, in Watchmen watching all those televisions at the same time.

Ritalin is a stimulant, it’s an upper. It boosts your brain’s feel-good chemicals – which you would think is the last thing someone with hyperactivity issues would need. Right?

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